There is a lot of dry old cake in this city and not a morsel of it is baked at Fatties Bakery.
Fatties belongs to Chloe Timms, a salted caramel goddess of our time. Chloe has the kind of feed that Instagram was made for — all swirling brownie mix, hot chocolates mid-pour, and wildly glossy cake close-ups. Instagram should pay her. I’m forever receiving her shots via DM from my friends. They caption them: “When can we??????” or “STOP!!!!” or heart eye emoji.
Fatties can be found at Maltby Street Market. I don’t know about you, but when food is at markets, I don’t really believe it’s there. And in any case, I’m very busy at weekends — getting out of bed, cuddling my dog and reloading the cafetiere. But at the end of last year I visited Chloe’s little pop-up in Browns’ east London outpost — an acutely hip space that features an art gallery, a meditation room and people saying things like “Well, McQueen jewellery is like a go-to, you know? It’s just easy”. Mate, I know.
I went for gold. The Goldmine brownie (£4) is the signature: a deep, dark, dense brownie absolutely rammed with salted caramel. But the true bargain is the golden bocadito (£2), a salted caramel cornflake cake doused with actual gold. Yes, that’s right, a cake caked in gold — it’s only what you deserve.
Keep the change, my friends,