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Boris Johnson Would Bleed for Your Right to Cook a Burger Rare

The man who is somehow still in contention to lead the country has some interesting priorities

Boris Johnson’s Tory leader campaign to be Prime Minister rests on rare burgers Photo by Ian Forsyth/Getty Images

Cut Boris Johnson and he bleeds pink burgers

Prolific expresser of racist, sexist, and Islamophobic sentiments Boris Johnson is waging war on the draconian binds manacling this country. No, not the EU. Burger cooking. In an interview for the Spectator, Johnson bemoans the “ludicrous” regulations that prevent many restaurants from serving pink patties. In the very same interview, he suggests that increased food bank use is not down to austerity, and damaging reform of benefits policies, but just the unaccountable “low pay.” This isn’t just bluster, it also overlooks two key facts: a rare, genuinely rare burger, would be horrific to eat; tonnes of London restaurants serve pink burgers, legally.

While his opponent Jeremy Hunt has necked cold pizza and drunk a milkshake in service of emphasising his everyman culinary credentials, Boris has done little in the way of personal food promotion — barring the below, extremely bizarre wearing of some raw sausages. At least the porkies are around his neck, rather than in his writing, on his buses, and spewing out of his mouth.

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