McDonald’s Spicy Nuggets Are Normal Chicken Nuggets With a Spray Tan

That’s not a spicy nugget

McDonald’s has unleashed its spicy chicken nuggets on the U.K., promising something spicier than before, a new nug, a genuine update on the fast food classic that is a McNugget. It comes with the #spon approval of tomato and Tabasco sauce. Its exterior is a fragile, but powerful orange, suggesting genuine S P I C E.

It is nothing of the sort. The heat — for there is a little — is flat, blunt, and dull — the low nagging hum of a latter-stage hangover headache. It brings out the worst qualities in the meat of the nugget, overtaking the flavour so all it contributes is a mealy, loose texture, particularly when still warm. Things are better on cooling and on dipping. The sauce tastes like Tabasco. Perhaps these are not the nuggets you are looking for. Perhaps they are. One thing is for sure: they are not spicy enough.

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• Drinks magnate Diageo has acquired a significant majority stake in Seedlip, the much-talked-about zero alcohol ‘spirit’ brand. [MCA]
• Good tweet: