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Welcome back to Insta Stories, a column examining the London restaurant scene through the often-problematic medium of Instagram. This week’s filter is the fascination of the abomination.
News of the week
It’s probably too late to prove it now, but when Shakespeare wrote “summer’s lease hath all too short a date,” he most likely wasn’t writing about the fleeting window in which the dog days of summer bleed slowly into the first weeks of autumn, resulting in a cornucopia of produce that would leave almost any food-lover breathless with lust. Mushrooms! Plums! Figs! Corn! Seriously, it is hard to overstate how much corn! As Sonnet 18 suggests, enjoy it while it lasts.
Other news of the week
[Expectant eyes emoji]
Reality check of the week
Important reminder that ‘Eat Out to Help Out’ is at best a short term sticking plaster and at worst actively unhelpful and that there is a long way to go and much more helping out required before anyone in government can consider this box ticked.
U OK, hun(s)?” of the week
Squid Milanese? Turbot Wellington? Fish cacio e pepe? An actually enjoyable Hawaiian pizza? The UK’s legendary silly season seems to be in full swing on the capital’s menus this week — perhaps the only thing more alarming than the idea of such maximalist culinary car crashes is that they all look... Kind of awesome?
Emoji-length summation of an artist’s masterpiece of the week
True story: Francis Bacon would have been huge on the ‘gram.
Compatibility test of the week
High Fidelity’s “what really matters is what you like, not what you are like” dictum, but with different types of preserved seafood instead of bands and movies.
Pâtés en croute of the week
Three makes a trend, the unchanging and unquestionable logic of fashion mag journalism dictates, so... pâté en croute is now a thing?
Elevated sandwich game of the week
Last time round it was the classic fish finger sarnie that got the 40 Maltby Street treatment; seven days later and a chicken, bacon and mushroom fritter sandwich is now something it is possible to buy over the counter without a prescription. What a time to be alive.
Mystery condiment of the week
Therapist: Don’t worry, NutzillaTM can’t hurt you.
NutzillaTM:
Dish of the week
Ugh hate it when a chef goes OTT with the plating
Shot of the week
Bring it on, winter.