Liz Truss has resigned as prime minister, losing out to an iceberg lettuce purchased by the Daily Star in the battle to not wilt.
Truss was “elected” by the Conservative Party’s membership a mere 45 days ago, and formally made PM by the Queen on 8 September. In that time she has overseen the death of Queen Elizabeth II; the tanking of the British economy; and now her own demise, but could not surpass the challenge of outlasting a non-sentient lump of plant matter and water.
Truss said she could “no longer deliver the mandate” upon which she had set out her stall, and spoke to King Charles III before resigning.
This will trigger another leadership election, with no sign of the Conservatives calling for a general election in which, by all measure, they would lose. The election will take place within the next week, by which time the lettuce, wilted and shrivelled, will go into the bin knowing that it outlasted a British prime minister.